Confession

A SMILE FOR HELP

Here she is. Laughing, smiling, and showing how confident she is. Everybody loves her smile, everybody admires her because of how fearless she looks. Some girls see a threat in her, some guys see a potential in her. But deep down, right at the bottom of her heart, it’s a completely different story.

Smart and kindness are what some thinks of her. Complaisant and selfless she is for others. However, what they don’t know, is the gap she is trying to fill.  She feels empty. She feels alone. Yes, she feels alone. Around her, she is admired, she is “loved”, yet she feels alone. She feels misunderstood. They look at her, yet they don’t see her.  They talk to her, but don’t listen to her.

Her nights are filled with sorrows, tears, and regrets. Regrets for what she could have done differently, for what she could have said, or kept for herself. Regrets for trusting people who ended up hurting her. Regrets for trusting in Humanity. Regrets for trusting that one can change for the better. Regrets for believing that she can be understood and be seen for what she really is.

In the dark, she thinks about people she wishes she should have never met, choices she should have never made, paths she should have never took. And here come the tears; expression of her despair and her silence.

All she wants is to say out loud all the things that are crushing her heart.  She needs an ear that can listen, a brain that can understand, a heart that can empathize, and arms that can give hugs. This is all she is asking.

Then comes the sun; sign of a new day, a new chapter. She wakes up, looks at the ceiling and smiles. Smiles like nothing happened the night before. Did she forget? No she did not. But she has faith; faith that there is always a chance for a change. And this is why she will always be this smart and kind-looking girl in the eyes of the world. She will never let go of that smile.

Ann-Eurielle 

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