I don’t think I can play this game.
What if I lose at the end? What if I fall at the end?
Are you gonna catch me?! Are you gonna be there with me?!
I know you appreciate the experience. I know you said it’s appealing but I’m new to this. Believe or not , I’m trying. I’m trying to live a little. I’m trying to live in the present. I’m trying to stop overthinking. But I’m going to be honest. It’s HARD. Harder than I thougt.
I asked for advice before I got into this. Everybody thought that it was a good idea to keep going, even through the risk . I thought I was ready too. But I can’t. The deepe I am in , the more I feel insecure, the more I feel uncertain, the more I question myself.
Don’t I deserve better? Don’t I deserve stability, security? The unknown is killing me slowly.
I thought I could follow you , support you, cheer for you , but the stakes are too high for me . I wish you nothing but the best but I have to go, fly with my own wings and do what’s best for me .
So you have an old crusty couch at home. It is full of holes and the cushions have deflated. You then decide to go online and search for a new couch. Here you are on every furniture websites, searching for a couch that can fit your budget, your likings but most importantly, a couch of good quality. After days of searching you found the right one. Without a doubt you add it to your basket, get your credit card and pay for it, installation fee included. You get your receipt and the delivery information.
You’re very excited . Your brand new couch is coming. You’re finally going to be able to invite your friends over with no shame. You’re finally going to be able to take your “pre-nap” before going to bed at night. You’re finally going to be comfortable.
The delivery day has come. The delivery men are ready to install your brand new couch in your living room, but when they get there, that old crusty couch is still there. You didn’t get rid of it. That old crusty couch is taking up the space of your brand new one,they thus cannot install it until you make space accordingly.
It is then the same thing with our life. So many times we ask God for blessings, we ask the Universe for guidance but we’re so slow to get rid of bad habits, bad relationships, bad environments.We linger in the past, and are slow to move forward which in turn delay the process of our breakthrough.
Sometimes all we need is to make up some space, declutter in order to welcome new energy, and blessings.
I see you,
I see you for who you are
I see you for who you were
I see you you for who you want to be
I see the pain through your eyes
I see the sorrows
I see the regrets
I see your desires
I see beyond that beautiful body of yours
I see your soul
I see your mind,
And I see your spirit
I see beneath that happy facade of yours
I see the perpetual fights in your daily life
I see the eternal battles in your quest for survival
Yes I see you,
And only you.